[Event] Overrun by the Vandalizer

[illirica]

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A few things about this event, before you hop in!
1. It is open to anyone, but make sure you've got a CS up first unless you're just running an NPC.
2. No more than one character per person.
D. This is not meant to be entirely serious, the wackier the characters involved, the better. I am running a sentient evil van, after all.
E. You can be a hero, you can be a villain, you can be Just Some Guy, whatever floats your boat.
4. No major location destruction (some is fine)

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It was a hot day in Texas. They were all hot days, because Texas was as hot as it got. Bigger, better, and hotter than any other state, for sure. Houston was the hottest of them all, of course, don't let those idiots from San Antonio tell you otherwise. On this hot, hot day in Texas, a white van drove placidly through the streets, playing its little jingle for the children.

Driver Nick had one arm resting on the open window, the other hand on the wheel as he drove slowly and carefully. Now and then, he'd lean out and add his voice to the song of the truck: "Hi, kids! There's ice cream in the back!" He grinned at them as he took the money they offered - dollars, quarters, pennies, a handful of slugs - it didn't matter how much it was. They didn't even have to give him anything at all, but most of them felt better when they did. Kids didn't trust free ice cream these days - the world was getting too untrusting. Ask for money, though, and people would give you anything they could, as long as they could give you less money. "Strawberry, chocolate, or vanilla!" One by one, they clambered into the back in search of a cool treat.

They didn't come back out. The Van drove on, in search of a shady spot and some new children to delight. It pulled up beside a double-parked Tesla with a battle cry of "Nice parking, asshole!", and nudged the Tesla forward with several tons of Detroit Steel and a disgruntled attitude behind a shiny silver bumper.

The shade was lovely, cool and inviting. Driver Nick leaned out the window again. "Who wants some candy?"

[Contingency]

"Who wants some candy?"

The words echoed in Angela's ears as she heard the enigmatic drivers inquiry, two blocks and four stories away from his positon she was Huh how convenient I could use a ressuply of lollipops she sniffed the air attempting to pinpoint what types of candy he had but to her surprise she had difficulty finding any trace of her favorite delectables with her keen nose.

Activating her temporal powers she accelerated her own time line and arrived to where the driver was parked before any of the children did "right" Angela said sardonically as she crossed her arms and tilted her chip up complacently before squinting her eyes like a commanding officer would in skepticism towards underlings. She nudged her head towards the back of 'his' van "I suppose it's in the back there huh?" This isn't the best use of my time but if you're waiting for someone and they haven't arrived might as well investigate shadey people, it's not like a schmuck like this one could drug or even reliably threaten me with a weapon"

[LunaHawk]

League business...in Texas...again. Gale Xanders left the league building where the meeting of owners had just taken place and approached her car. A snap of her fingers and the doors opened but there was no guest to take with her, not today anyway. As much as she wanted to invite a male along...especially this time of year...none of the males in the owner's club were worth two minutes of her time and about half of them couldn't get it up in the first place. No matter how many times the Dallas owner kept flirting with her. What a creep. She slid into the driver's seat and pushed a button. The doors slid back down and sealed tight to the car with a soft pneumatic hiss. Her holograiphic center console activated but she waved it away with the motion of her hand. Today she was just going to drive...anywhere. She needed some time to herself and less time surrounded by the pheremones of males that weren't worth two minutes of her time.

Her car, capable of exceeding speeds of two hundred miles an hour, easily cruised through Texas, it's engine purring like a predator shifting into an aggressive posture. A wave of her hand brought up the holographics again and she swiped through a series of radio stations like swiping apps on a phone. Eventually she found a conservative talk radio station and left it there, shaking her head at something one of the callers was saying. What a freaking idiot.

She pulled into a park and slowed...it was then that her eyes fell on the creepy ice cream van. It was creepy because it was an ice cream van. No one trusted those things these days and for good reason. She saw a female speaking to the driver and pulled up into a parking spot a few paces away, the lovely purr of the engine announcing the vehicle's arrival. It made the Tesla look cheap. Hell it made most houses look cheap. She turned the engine off with the push of a button and opened the door. Gale Xanders, billionaire and NFL team owner stepped out of the vehicle and snapped her fingers. The door sealed shut behind her.

For now she watched, cocking her head slightly and listening as the female questioned if the candy was in the back of the van. It and certain doom. Hatchlings these days. Too trusting. She thought and thought for a moment about the good old days when kids were kids and ice cream vans were ice cream vans.

Maybe she was wrong.

Yeah right.

[KidPerfect]

Why was he in Texas? Chalk it up to a bad bet, three hundred dollars worth of Oreos and some mini golf. Either way, how he got there wasn't important, it's what he found there. He'd been sitting on the roof of a building eating a sandwich when he looked down and spotted them. Some people looking at an ice cream truck. Yeah maybe not the most astounding of things, but some context was needed.

You see Jakey had a little thing he liked to call his radar, a sort of sense that alerted him of people who knew what they were doing. Subtle body language and a confident stance, all things that got the sirens in his head going. This sense was only exasperated when it came to looking at those skilled in fighting. He didn't quite know why, but he also wasn't complaining. He'd gotten his ass kicked everytime he'd picked a fight with someone who set off his sense and he was loving it.

Now back to the ice cream truck, when he spotted the two lovely ladies staring at it a wide grin spread across his face. He could damn near feel the aura off the both of them from up where he was. The one standing next to her car was tough, he could tell that from a glance. He'd lose, he was sure about that, but given enough time he was confident he could take her. The other one though, well he had goosebumps already. If the other one was strong, then she was just unfair. He'd be obliterated before he even got close, the gap was far too large. Course that just meant he had that much more to learn,

Now saying that the girl with pink hair who appeared out of nowhere and the woman who stepped out of a multimillion-dollar car were special wasn't the most astute observation, but he didn't care. Pushing off from the roof he bounced off an awning to slow his fall before executing a flawless landing he'd seen during the 2008 Olympics. Reaching into his letterman's pocket and fishing out the small domino mask he'd been using for a while, he placed it on his face.

Grinning he flipped a coin, tails, Ms. Moneybags it was. With that Kid Perfect sprinting off towards the direction of the car.

---

[LunaHawk]

Why was he in Texas? Chalk it up to a bad bet, three hundred dollars worth of Oreos and some mini golf. Either way, how he got there wasn't important, it's what he found there. He'd been sitting on the roof of a building eating a sandwich when he looked down and spotted them. Some people looking at an ice cream truck. Yeah maybe not the most astounding of things, but some context was needed.

You see Jakey had a little thing he liked to call his radar, a sort of sense that alerted him of people who knew what they were doing. Subtle body language and a confident stance, all things that got the sirens in his head going. This sense was only exasperated when it came to looking at those skilled in fighting. He didn't quite know why, but he also wasn't complaining. He'd gotten his ass kicked everytime he'd picked a fight with someone who set off his sense and he was loving it.

Now back to the ice cream truck, when he spotted the two lovely ladies staring at it a wide grin spread across his face. He could damn near feel the aura off the both of them from up where he was. The one standing next to her car was tough, he could tell that from a glance. He'd lose, he was sure about that, but given enough time he was confident he could take her. The other one though, well he had goosebumps already. If the other one was strong, then she was just unfair. He'd be obliterated before he even got close, the gap was far too large. Course that just meant he had that much more to learn,

Now saying that the girl with pink hair who appeared out of nowhere and the woman who stepped out of a multimillion-dollar car were special wasn't the most astute observation, but he didn't care. Pushing off from the roof he bounced off an awning to slow his fall before executing a flawless landing he'd seen during the 2008 Olympics. Reaching into his letterman's pocket and fishing out the small domino mask he'd been using for a while, he placed it on his face.

Grinning he flipped a coin, tails, Ms. Moneybags it was. With that Kid Perfect sprinting off towards the direction of the car.

---

Scent was a useful tool to those who could detect it. To a Reptonian, who's sense of smell was highly refined it might as well be a weapon. This was the sense that alerted her to the new arrival. It did more than alert her though it identified him as a male in the throws of teenage years who's blood was flooded with adrenaline. That fact alone could mean any number of things but it instantly put her on alert.

For now she kept her attention on the van...but she did not inwardly ignore his presence. She kept her back to the approaching male but tracked him first by scent, then by using the advanced senses of her eye implants to collect dozens of fractured reflections from every nearby surface until they could construct a partial reflection of his approaching form. This she tracked on the periphery of her vision.

Gale made no outward sign of preparation, she didn't know if he was here to help or hinder the investigation but his approt did not put her at ease. Her instinct, honed over millions of years of evolution and ten thousand years of experience told her he was a predator, the question was if he was a rival or simply after the same thing. She would fine out soon.

[illirica]

---

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Contingency's inquiry was met by a cheerful "Have a nice day!" from the driver, accompanied by a thumb in the direction of the rear - which presumably meant that yes, the candy was in the back. Driver Nick had parked the van for the time being, and pulled a lever beside him that unlocked the rear doors to the van, opening them wide. Lurking within the recesses was... a small chest freezer full of ice cream bars, in the advertised chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry - mostly vanilla and strawberry, to be fair. Opposing the freezer was a divided candy dispenser, for suckers; hard candies and taffy and lollipops.

The entire display was about four feet in length, ending at another latched door, where the Van kept extra supplies. Driver Nick waved at the newer arrivals, with a pleasant greeting of "Nice weather today! Need a snack?"

On the surface, it all seemed like it was supposed to be, and yet... and yet. Something wasn't quite right. Visually, everything added up just right, but at least two of the people around the van had other senses that were far superior to the average human's. While the ice cream smelled with the usual vague-flavoring beneath generalized frostiness scent and the candy was sweet and fruity, it was the driver that didn't smell quite right. He didn't really smell at all. If he smelled like anything, it was the same generalized frostiness of ice buildup on the inside of a freezer, trapping other scents too old and indistinct to identify properly, but hinting at what might have been around some time in the past.

[Contingency]

What would I do for a Klondike bar?

Angela was intially suspicious of the driver but her skepticsim disappeared as her focus was stolen by the smell of sweets, when she saw the delectibles were real through a quick glance from the outside of the van she could not contain herself feeling like a dog staring at a pile of dog treats just resting unattended. Get in a van with a complete stranger apparently Angela mentally chided herself but her primal instincts took control after being captivated by the sight of her favorite icecream Klondike bars, oh god I have to have one she got in the van only after a second thought and gambled the risk with the assumption that a combination of her healing factor and chronokinetic abilities would allow her to survive any hidden shenanigans the driver of the vehicle might have.

As for the people outside, they escaped Angela's train of thought maybe if they had klondike bars on their person she would have payed attention to them to but for the moment she was reaching into a hidden compartment of her nanosuit and pulling out a few dollar bills before knocking on the latched door "hey mister how much for a Klondike bar?"

[KidPerfect]

While the woman didn't make any moves that showed she'd noticed his approach Jakey still slowed down as he got closer to her. As he walked around the side of the car he finally got a good look at her face, and as he did something clicked. Oh, huh, that's Gale Xanders ain' it? He thought, raising his eyebrow. He didn't normally pay much attention to the rich or famous unless they had done something particularly badass. This was different though, he remembered her reignited the conspiracy theorist who thought the world's elite were all lizard people. The fact that one of them really was gave Jakey a small laugh when he heard about it.

Anywho, while he'd never actually fought a dinosaur he'd watched Jurassic Park, which was probably close enough. Just dodge the teeth, the talons, the feet, and the tail, easy peasy. Besides he'd already decided he was going to fight her, he wasn't going to change his mind now.

Completly oblivious to the van, it's ice cream, and whatever threat it might possibly hold Kid Perfect moved in front of Gale and gave her a wave, still baring the same grin he had running up to her. "Hey, Miss, or Xanders, whatever you wanna be called. Kinda hoping I figured out something to say while I walked over her, but frankly, you seem like you'd be a shit ton of fun to fight... So what do ya say, down to trade blows?"

[illirica]

The knock on the latched door had a surprising effect - first, it didn't seem to connect to the driver in any way, and second, it disappeared entirely, resulting in a swirling portal that reached out tendrils of negative energy and tried to suck her inside. The portal expanded, covering the latched door entirely and most of the separating wall, and through it the stares of empty-eyed children met Contingency with surprising levels of interest. A few of them shuffled towards the portal, though they seemed less interested in her, and more interested on out - passing beyond her and into the back area of the van.

A small discolored hand reached out for the candy bins, helping itself to a few hard candies and stuffing them in an opened mouth, wrappers and all. That was as far as the instinct went, though, and the soulless child wandered off to the back of the van, mouth still open revealing wrapped candies. He wobbled at the back edge, then fell over on his face, smashing his nose in the process. There was no blood, though. Only places where the flesh tore aside like fabric as he picked himself back up and started to wander off down the street.

---

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[LunaHawk]

While the woman didn't make any moves that showed she'd noticed his approach Jakey still slowed down as he got closer to her. As he walked around the side of the car he finally got a good look at her face, and as he did something clicked. Oh, huh, that's Gale Xanders ain' it? He thought, raising his eyebrow. He didn't normally pay much attention to the rich or famous unless they had done something particularly badass. This was different though, he remembered her reignited the conspiracy theorist who thought the world's elite were all lizard people. The fact that one of them really was gave Jakey a small laugh when he heard about it.

Anywho, while he'd never actually fought a dinosaur he'd watched Jurassic Park, which was probably close enough. Just dodge the teeth, the talons, the feet, and the tail, easy peasy. Besides he'd already decided he was going to fight her, he wasn't going to change his mind now.

Completly oblivious to the van, it's ice cream, and whatever threat it might possibly hold Kid Perfect moved in front of Gale and gave her a wave, still baring the same grin he had running up to her. "Hey, Miss, or Xanders, whatever you wanna be called. Kinda hoping I figured out something to say while I walked over her, but frankly, you seem like you'd be a shit ton of fun to fight... So what do ya say, down to trade blows?"

Gale shifted her gaze from the van to the hatchling in front of her and cocked her head slightly. This was not what she had expected from him. Or anyone else, for that matter. She was about to answer when some sort of zombie child stumbled out of the van and her eye implants registered esoteric energies inside of the vehicle. She had opened her mouth slightly to speak and then stopped and pointed his towards the van.

"Perhaps, but first we have a bigger issue." She wouldn't mind sparring with him, people needed training and that included her, against all manner of foes...but she was not about to fight him in the middle of this...strangeness. "Let's take care of the zombie generating van first shall we?" She asked him. She shifted her focus, her hand drifted to one of the guns on her thigh but she thought better of it and instead unhooked one of the sickle blades from her hip and wrapped her fingers around it so the blade emerged from between the two middle fingers of her hand. Even then she remained for a moment where she was. Her eye implants scanned the zombie child for any signs of energy, not life. She didn't need anything to tell her he was very much not alive.

"You want to earn a fight, help me shut this down." She told Kid Perfect and went to move past him and move to the wandering zombie child. "A woman just walked into the back, see if you can get her out before it sucks her in." She added, hoping to take control of the situation before things escalating. Also hoping Kid Perfect wasn't goofy enough to try and fight her right now anyway just because he didn't care about anything else. She really hoped he wasn't the type to hyper focus on his objective rather than events surrounding him. If he did nothing to stop her she would walk to the zombie kid and attempt to slash her claw through its spine right near the base of the neck and see if that severed it from whatever had it moving. She would not use enough of the knife edge for a decapitation.